Recently I had to institute the offsides rule in my classroom. Granted, I don’t fully comprehend the rule, and, as I am wont to do, I have adjusted it to meet my needs. Life is so much easier when you can make things mean what you want them to mean.
My lamby-pie that seeks attention in every way imaginable
still needs protection from the angry mob on occasion (okay, all the time), One day I was having trouble keeping one eye on him and one eye on the other fifteen schmoopies in my class. Attention-seeking lamby-pie was practically sneaking behind my back and jumping up and down in his efforts to get punched in the face, and I didn’t think I was going to be able to keep it from happening (again).
I called out to the other schmoopies that I was instituting the “offisides rule” and gave a brief explanation. Basically, I just said they had to keep me in between them and attention-seeking lamby-pie at all times. I kept my eyes on the lamby-pie and the schmoopies took the new rule seriously. Whichever way I moved, they moved to keep me in front of them.
Okay, I’ll admit, it was kind of fun. I even squeezed them into a corner at one point. Why? Because they let me.
Goal Progress: 5/20 (slow-going, eh?)